The expression, "never judge a book by its cover," is more often than not reserved for anyone trying to teach a lesson about the contents of something being greater than its initial presentation.
Not so at 15 Glenview Heights Lane in King Township, just a short commute north of Toronto.
Despite the nearly $7M price tag and the well-kempt facade, things at the rural mansion -- currently selling under the power of sale -- begin to unravel rather quickly once you move past the nicely manicured front steps.
That said, the property is being sold "as is where is," so any buyer should be aware that what they see is literally what they're going to get. This includes several rooms appearing to have been designed by a Disney princess who was suddenly called off to another more exciting King (see what we did there) in the middle of said designing. Case in point:
Mismatched wallpaper, more trees than places to sit, a pretty chandelier, and a headboard that looks like it watches over an evil step-mother while she sleeps -- what more could a bedroom need?
Want to shower? No problem.
Want to shower without getting the rest of the bathroom wet? Not. An. Option.
Thankfully, you won't care, you'll just be happy to be cooling off after the loneliest treadmill run in the world.
Of course, the home isn't all half-empty, half-finished rooms. Some of it is just completely empty, really leaning into that "recently abandoned" look we're sure will be all the rage in 2023.
Ok, ok. We kid. We jest. We move on.
The house does have some things going for it. Several of its rooms are thought out and decently put together. Especially if you like rocks getting the attention they deserve.
And we wouldn't ever suffer cooking a meal in the kitchen (though we may go backsplash blind):
Overall, it's hard to expect much from anything being sold in "as is" condition. But since, in this case, they're asking for seven million of something, caveat emptor seems like the most low-key warning available. Perhaps one should consider "buyer bescared" as an appropriate alternative.
- Address: 15 Glenview Heights Lane, King, Ontario
- Bedrooms: 5
- Bathrooms: 6
- Lot size: 1.92 acres (237.42 x 368.86 feet)
- Price: $6,900,000
For now, we'll leave you with a few more photos of the home but, if you're like us, you'll simply end up having more questions than answers about this unfinished
diamond opportunity in the rough.
Is that... a shower back there?
The next American Ninja Warrior set.
"Relax" they said.